Content that opened my heart this season

Winter 2025

Sometimes a season can feel like a year. For me, this winter was one of those seasons. Arriving at spring was like wandering through a corn maze: like all there is is here, now, this infinite path that, on the one hand, I hope we will eventually find our way out of, but on the other, I just want to burrow in and wander here forever…

Here, where there’s been less certainty, but more trust; less technology, but more connection; less life, but more living.

My first sighting of cherry blossoms in Astoria this year, on March 15, which caused me to stop in my tracks and gasp! Spring is here!

Through these dark days of wintering, fiction has been a balm. So, let’s start with books.

Books

I unintentionally read several books about mothering this season. They prompted reflection on the paradox mothers hold between a level of devotion that inspires one to do anything and everything in one’s power to protect this precious being you gave life to, and the constant awareness that nothing is guaranteed. That this being has a fate of their own, and part of the responsibility of parenting is to honor and trust the sovereignty in that. An impossible task, which I am honored to witness my sister and close friends navigating with tremendous grace.

1. The Art of Joy, Goliarda Sapienza. Modesta– the protagonist of Sapienza’s glorious Sicilian novel–exemplifies a kind of mothering that recognizes and honors children’s sovereignty. So much so that, in all honesty, she unsettled me. I feared for little Modesta’s awareness of her own sovereignty as she discovered and proclaimed her sexuality at age 5, manipulated nuns to free herself of convent life, took many lovers across the spectrum of gender despite her status as una principessa, and later sent her child across the island when the Fascists were stealing innocent hearts and minds. And yet, I couldn’t–I can’t–stop thinking about her. Reading The Art of Joy was like a descent into one of her multi-day dream spells, where I emerged as yet another of her past (but still so present) lovers.

2. Circe, Madeline Miller. Also a defiant, magical being like Modesta, Circe captured my attention with her righteous, caring ways. Since reading her story, I’ve enjoyed considering things from the perspective of an everlasting goddess, particularly one who gives birth to a human and becomes wracked with the pain of his mortality. The lengths she goes for his safety only make sense because she is his mother–his mother who will do anything to protect him, despite his fate.

3. Breath, Eyes, Memory, Edwidge Danticat. The lengths a mother goes to protect her child are sometimes driven by violent, harmful forces beyond her control. These forces create patterns that extend to the next generation, and the next, until a cycle-breaker is born. This delicate, unstinted novel honors the life of one cycle-breaking mother and humanizes the women who came before her.

   

   I spent many sunsets on my Sicilian balcony with this book, a luxury for which I’m very grateful

Articles & Essays

1. A Letter to Etta,

   Matthew R. Manning
   . Throughout all the reading and reflection on parenting this season, I have been holding my dear friends’ late infant, Etta, in the center of my heart. Matthew and his wife Courtney have been navigating the most impossible loss, and simultaneously keeping Etta very much alive through ritual, creative expression, attention to her spirit, and many daily acts of love. Please take a moment, when you have the emotional capacity, to read Matthew’s letter and support their GoFundMe. You are loved into eternity, Etta. 🕊️

2. fire szn,

   KL Mays
   . I’ve thought often about this piece since I read it. So raw and sooo fucking real. Big love to everyone navigating loss in the aftermath of fires and other climate crises.

3. Like Water, We Re-Member: A Conceptual Model of Identity (Re)formation through Cultural Reclamation for Indigenous Peoples of Mexico in the United States, My Ngoc To, et al. It was refreshing to read an academic piece that embraced uncertainty and honesty at every turn. The storytelling is powerful, and as someone who thinks a lot about assimilation’s toll on our humanity, the authors’ Model of Identity (Re)formation through Cultural Reclamation is one I’ll return to to ground my work. Thanks, Olivia, for sharing this piece in The River!

4. overcoming your fear of death and the unknown, The Borderline Crisis. Death has been far too present this season, as I know it has been for many of you too. This piece offers several practices that can help us work with our fear of death.

5. The Great Turning, Joanna Macy. When I realized this piece was written in 2009, my heart smiled. Because the examples Joanna shared about how we are moving toward a life-sustaining civilization have only multiplied in the past 16 years. We are turning with greater speed, and so we feel dizzy, but, as Joanna said, many of our actions are “flowing from our creativity and collaboration on behalf of life… [they] may look marginal, but they hold the seeds for the future.”

African American pilgrims dance in honor of ancient spirits. Lake Nasser, Egypt., by Chester Higgins, from the Flight Into Egypt exhibition at The Met

Podcasts

1. Earthly Reads: Alexis Pauline Gumbs on Survival is a Promise, For the Wild. Would it be a seasonal content round-up if Alexis Pauline Gumbs wasn’t featured in some way? 🙂 If you read my Autumn 2024 compilation, you know I cherished Survival is a Promise. This brief podcast with its author is a grounding toward the earth and a stretch toward the stars, and it left me with a feeling of possibility that seems to emanate from everything Alexis Pauline Gumbs does.

2. Seed Saving as Antidote to Colonization, Getting to the Root of It With

   Venus Roots
   . The ceasefire in Gaza has been broken and genocide continues. The pain in that sentence is unbridled; the collective rage and heartbreak, overwhelming. And yet, this interview with Vivien Sansour is a reminder that life–Palestinian life in particular–persists. It persists through the seeds we sow and the patient care we offer, with hope for an eventual sprout.

3. Survivor Chronicles: Free Them All, Survived & Punished NY. My comrades at S&P launched a podcast!! Highly recommend engaging with the stories of survivors who were criminalized for their acts of survival and are now courageously, powerfully banding together to demand clemency. You can also find links on their site for actions you can take to free them all!!

“let's sing those toughened men out of their trenches and back into their mother's lullabies”

— Zeina Hashem Beck

Films & Videos

1. Toni Morrison: The Pieces I Am. This wasn’t my first time watching this documentary, but it was just as enjoyable as the first time! Toni Morrison had such clarity, such astute intuition around the human condition. And talk about a powerful mother! Phew, we are so much better because of her.

2. 3arabi Song, Zeina Hashem Beck featuring the Fayha Choir. An emotional, heartwarming 6-minute offering dedicated to Tripoli, Lebanon, and other Arab cities. A prayer for how our singing may transform the pain into peace.

One of many stunning paintings by Danilo Ricciardi

Exhibitions

A new category this season, because art helps.

1. Contemporary Painting by Danilo Ricciardi, Siracusa, Sicilia. It was a gift to stumble upon this small studio in the back of Palazzo Borgia del Casale on a quiet January afternoon. Aside from the painter and his friend smoking cigarettes and painting in the back room, Nick and I were the only people there, giving us plenty of space to linger and admire the beautiful bodies adorning the Palazzo walls. There’s a lot of great art in Siracusa (including a Caravaggio piece I saw there in December 2023), but this studio is definitely worth a visit if you find yourself in the southeastern corner of Sicilia.

2. Flight Into Egypt: Black Artists and Ancient Egypt, 1867-Now, The Met, New York City. The exhibition is closed now, but it was quite lengthy, dynamic, and memorable. You can take a (18 minute!) virtual tour on The Met’s website if you’re sorry to have missed it.

3. Georgia O’Keeffe Museum, Santa Fe, NM. I’ve had this collection of Georgia O’Keeffe’s work on my radar for some time, so I was sure to make time for a visit during a recent work trip to Santa Fe. And it didn’t disappoint! Georgia was just so cool!! She was ruthless in her quest to make fresh, unique art, while crafting an abundantly artful life.

An image of Georgia O’Keeffe, left, alongside a similar image of me in Palermo, Sicilia, June 2023, also trying to craft an artful life.

Meditations

Another new category this season, because breath helps too.

1. 28 Days of Compassion,

   Precisely!
   . Though I didn’t accomplish all 28 days, I delighted in moving through these guided practices most of the days of February. Thanks to the lovely folks at Courage of Care for curating the series, and for facilitating a small group of us through the Like Fire workshop this season. I continue to feel nourished by Courage spaces ♥️

2. Emotional Honesty is an Act of Care, Denise Shanté Brown. My friend Denise Shanté has many beautiful offerings in the world, both on Insight Timer and her captivating new website. This guided meditation was a reminder that sharing what’s on my heart is not just an act of care to others, but also to myself (even when what’s on my heart is daunting and difficult to face).

3. Release Resistance and Flow Like Water, Naami Padi. This meditation cracked me open when I needed a good cry. Life is hard, folks. Resistance to it is normal. But I hope we all find moments of release and flow in the safety of our solitude.

Music

1. Silence. Not music, but the absence of it. I suppose silence is not very accessible to most of us, but this winter I sought it out as often as possible. And instead of drowning out my spaces with constant music like usual, I listened, noticed what sounds were and were not there. That too has been a meditation.

2. Tiny Desk with Ana Tijoux. The energy, the soulful music, the cross-cultural solidarity. Love, love, love.

3. Come Around and Love Me, Jalen Ngonda. This album was initially shared with me in response to my request for long plane ride music, but has also been lovely background music to my home life. It’s especially perfect for a sweet Saturday afternoon in love.

A rain-drenched rose in Astoria, December 2024

Things I co-created this season

1. Shaping New Worlds Through Sensory Imagination, Dhara Shah and me! Ahino Collective was published in Arrow Journal this season! Check it out with a subscription to the journal.

2. Ancestral Connection as Anti-Racism Practice, Ahino Collective. It was a joy to revive this workshop that Dhara and I facilitated in 2020 for a group of creatrixes in The River. Please consider joining this life-giving community, and if you do, you can access the workshop and related offerings in The Lagoon.

3. Undoing Racism/ Community Organizing, The People’s Institute for Survival and Beyond. I’ll continue to extend this invite until I see each and every one of you in an Undoing Racism Workshop!! Vital knowledge, and even more vital humanistic energy, is imparted through this nourishing space. I’ll be co-facilitating the upcoming regional workshop in White Plains, NY, April 10-12, and I’d love to see you there.

Sunset in Sicilia, Jan 2025

And so the sun sets on another season. I know times are not easy right now, but I hope you can surrender to joy as often as possible in this coming season of renewal. Because, as Goliarda Sapienza wrote, “for the living, yesterday served only as fertilizer for this new today, tangible and filled with sunshine.”

With care,

Alyssa